Monday, October 30, 2023

guilt-shopping

if you want to shop for guilt
the options are dazzling 
the malls are well-stocked

there's guilt of war, of climate change
there's guilt about not meeting others expectations of us  
about not meeting our own 

we're guilty about the things we can't change 
we're guilty about what we can but don't. 
there's guilt about not living an authentic life
there's guilt about being selfish 

ah, guilt -- expensive, expensive guilt 
we spend extravagantly on buying guilt 
we beg, steal, borrow, we even seek it out  

it makes us feel important, this guilt 
but you know, sometimes it 
doesn't even belong to us. 

we can lament at who we have become 
power-hungry barbarians? 
planet-destroying beasts? 

or we can be economical, 
keep the burden light,
build a little bit of apathy, 

and distract ourselves 
with trees and birds and things --

things that are less heavy on the heart  
so that we can all 
move along now.


Thursday, June 22, 2023

lunch buddy

who do I have lunch with
in this sea of people
all disappearing into each other
with their swaying forks and laughing faces
so confident, loud, familiar 

who do I have lunch with
do I try to catch someone's eye
or do I wait for a friendly wave

do I look away and pretend I don't care
take my tray and sit
coolly and confidently by myself 
or will that appear rude? 

should I ask someone
if I may join them
or will that seem intrusive? 

who do I have lunch with
in this sea of people
all disappearing into each other

while I stand, so visible
to myself, heart racing
wishing to disappear
just like everyone else 

Wednesday, March 22, 2023

new

i don't know 
whether i'm in a rush 
to get to know you 

or if I'm in a rush 
to show you me 

Friday, March 17, 2023

Misfit

a misfit in most places 
I find relief and liberation
in the company
of strangers

I can pretend
I'm just like them

Wednesday, January 25, 2023

reminder

this is a note
that I will revisit 
on a day that I need reminding 

this is a vow 
to always find pockets of freedom 
within boundaries 
(even if I have to create them myself) 

this is a pledge
to sing loudly when there's silence 
and softly where there's noise 
(but to always have a melody within)

this is a promise 
that I will always find hope 
in every dancing autumn leaf
(even when it settles on wet ground)

this is a resolution
to unhesitatingly seek the warmth of family and friends
and offer as much of myself as I can 
(but also without depleting my resources) 

this is a pledge
to read and write and laugh and
make new friends and keep moving on 
(even on, especially on, days that tell me otherwise)  

and when I read this one day
I'll know that I was wise
to have written this note

to remind me that I've crafted
a rich, authentic, abundant life 
with intent. 

Tuesday, August 30, 2022

give it to me

give me your pain 

let me carry it for you 


I am not suffering 

but you are 


give me your pain 

I know it is not mine to carry 


but please

let me help

Saturday, August 20, 2022

joy

song in my body
spring in my step
heart so full
it's going to explode
in this moment
life is worth living 

Thursday, August 04, 2022

swim

i like many things about swimming 
but what i like best 
is finding weightlessness 

i'm buoyant  
unburdened by my own thoughts 
unbothered by what the world wants from me