tiny lights
flicker soft,
rooftop chill

radiant smiles,
glasses clink,
eye to eye

questions,
stories,sympathy
warm happiness

dance floor,
golden glint,
saxophone sway

old song we know,
mellow voices in
drunken harmony

a few hours,and
the party's over
they leave,happy-tired

sitting against the wall,
both of us
after everyone's gone

close,quiet
not wanting to move.
slowing down sunrise.

Coming back

faded memory
of green prints
on a blanket

of moments
that I'd caught
and held on to

put in an ice-box,
paint melting along the sides
orange-vivid puddles

at my feet,
leaving softer tones
less wild,more mature

I'd woken up early
that day,slipped out quietly
while you slept

its been a few years,
you knew wat i once was..
now I'm me

I'll see you soon.

friends,
constant,rock solid
friends for life

music room,
home for three years
we sang our way through

late night maggi,
last minute
crammin for exams

leaving and receiving
at katpadi station,
impromptu chennai trips

walking on the bunds
of paddy fields,
balancing acts

climbing vellore hills,
bruised,aching,laughing
getting high

dhaba treats,
(roti anna!)
bargainin with auto guys

gettin back after hols
to a new room
finding the best showers

friends,
whom I couldnt
do without

this place,
I'm sometimes
afraid to leave.

the voice shrieked,
as daggers of pain
pierced through

ten year old boy,
writhing,adjacent bed
in the emergency ward

the guilt was killing
standing,watching
and doing nothing

writhing within,
hands clasped,unconsciously
murmuring a prayer.

i thought it was
much easier
to block it out,

to pretend that
i'm okay with everything
but now i know

i'd rather feel
what i feel
than force myself

to not think,
for fear of
feeling what i feel.

2679

General compartment!
stand,or sit down
on newspaper

chinese scale,
for just ten rupees
pirated dvds,raw mangoes

chutney dribbles
from the vendor's idli basket
everytime he passes by

everyone stares
at everyone else,
an indian habit

nobody seems to mind
the heat,the sweat
the dirt,the tamil songs

playin on his cellphone
as he nods vigorously,
and sings along

two small kids,
their black, beady,
curious eyes

taking in every detail
not looking away,holding
a bold steadfast gaze

in the corner,
a young lady eats
a packed lunch,

curd rice and pickle,
and throws the rest
out of the window,

where paddy fields
and small villages
endlessly rumble past.

I took a walk today
in long bazaar
along the fort,
the heart of vellore

market-place smells
of fish,fruit,of afternoon
hung in the air
in chaotic competence

bright clothes lay
spread out on the roadside
in plain blues,yellows
among proud moviestar blacks

sunny families went
boating in the moat,
a cow on the footpath
moo-ed morosely at me

I dodged hawkers,
made my way through the crowd,
liking the lightness
of anonymity.

Drunken laughter,
you and your friends
just chillin,
havin fun,
your nightly routine
after the
long tiring day.

Ash falls.
Burn your
orange-glow souls
in a circle
on that couch
every eye reflects
hollow silhouettes.

5.30 am,
the bell rings
milkman,paperboy

amma's up already,
two cups of tea
one glass of bournvita

the maid arrives,with
her bright smile
gets to work

grandmom chants
her morning prayers,
the diya is lit

busy kitchen noises,
something sizzles
on a pan

and a delightful aroma
permeates the air
tv-ad style

background noise
of a news channel
or a hindi serial

familiar clink
of amma's bangles
and pressure cooker whistles

I'm home.

thoughts float,
bob up and down
like paper sailboats

in crooked,
rainfed rivulets
during monsoon

that diverge,
broaden,and
gurgle nothings

and sometimes
disappear into
potholes and drains

boat-marks erased
by the water,leaving
shades of soaked white

thoughts float,
bob up and down
like paper sailboats

and i dont know
which ones are yours
and which ones mine.

Raindrop
clinging to rusty
old iron bars.

splash,
one falls
to the ground.

born,
shivering,shining
another swollen pearl

bright oval,
swaying to and fro
at its tip.

water film,
reflecting
fleeting images.

unsteady world,
dissolving into nothing,
into everything.

of no consequence,
just another raindrop
trying to hold on

to rusty old
iron bars
in a moving train.

6 pm,
whiffs of a
clear,earthy
rain-flavoured wind

it starts off
as a tame drizzle
grows into a
full fledged downpour

some far away door
crashes against the wind
whoosh of the gale outside
curtains flying

close these windows now
thunder rumbles and roars
the world blinks
streaks of lightning

bang!
goes the transformer
frantic groping
for emergency lights

8 pm now,
they fade away soon,
flicker of the oil-lamp
burns a wind-distorted flame

black out in the apartment
someone's stuck in the lift
voices echo
in the corridor stairway

amma and I
sit in the balcony
black leaved trees
ominous animal outlines

its those monkeys again
chattering,swinging from
branch to brach
and into someone's kitchen.

we gossip,watch passers-by
mingled smell
of wet earth,
hot chai and samosas

Candle,with its
rainbow ringed yellow,
tilt it to get
wax finger-cups

familiar old routine,
hyderabadi ministorm,
I miss the excitement
of power cuts.

yellow days
like fraying edges
of old parchment

the dust of vellore
subtly golden
noise pixels

thirsty sun
coffee bean
roasted skin

dead flies
in the canteen
heat-killed conversations.

Smoking,
eyes glazed,
J after J.

Flying.

Oh how its gonna kill you
this thing
Thats keeping you alive.

Echoes
of hurried whispers,
giggles in an
old ruined house.

Unsteady hands
that once
steadied yours
fingers intertwined.

Monsoons
when we used to dance
now spent in
a dark smoke-filled room.

Tight embrace
fingers running
along a collarbone
now a lost feeling.

I hate you
for showing me
happiness,beauty
that doesnt last.

Empty face
you mean nothing to me
you're just another
sepia memory.

3 am stillness,
acrid tasting.
Sleepless
moist eyes burn.
Fingers,toes
curl inward.
Cancerous pain..
Swallowed.

Gimme a blanket
Its cold here.

Ooo I'm walking on the ceiling
I'm looking up at the floor
I'm laughing,happy
singing out loud.

Colours race
through my head
Rainbow bubbles
I blink-they pop

Oh how good it feels
my mind's empty
I'm levitating,
I'm riding through space

Exaggerated emotions
strangely lack feeling
The world's fuzzy
so much better this way

Ooo I'm walking on the ceiling
I'm looking up at the floor
I'm laughing,happy
singing out loud.

Scowl

Let me be rude
Let me snap
and let it hurt.
Allow me to pretend
I can rid myself
of this frustration
by passing it on to you.

From a tea leaf to a human

I have given
All I had
and all that was expected of me.

My life is complete.

I have been boiled
till all my colour drained out
leaving me pallid and weak.
I have been squeezed mercilessly
to yield the last drop of my flavour.
I have lived not for myself
but for you,
and now I'm reduced to
nothing but manure.

My friend...
our lives are the same.
--------

p.s. definitely not one of the better ones,but thought I'd post it anyway.

I've got
writer's block.
Aiyyooo.